From: Never@your.door (Capt. Meat) Subject: Oxycontin de Mexico, Full Moon Delusion & the Demise of Our Great Pumpkin Date: 20 Feb 2000 Newsgroups: alt.drugs.hard jesus-h-christ winding a wristwatch... i turned around 5 minutes ago and it was tomorrow morning but still dark outside...and where the here-and-now seemed genuinely authentic around one'o'clock, nothing is real at 2:55 a.m. except for the waddah-waddah-waddah rumble of the overhead helicopter, which is twisting into my skull like a flat-head screw into dry cement... so i'm throwing out the rest of my cerebral itinerary (not to mention the baby and the bathwater) and shooting from the femoral instead... Q: What painkillers are available in Mexico? A: "For the most part, nothing but crap. Codeine. Neo-Percodan. Temagesic (sp?). Don't bother." well, folks, estoy aqui to report that about a week ago, i was in Nogales, Mexico, where i witnessed a consultation as well as the writing of a prescription, a total of four phone calls made by the doctor, two drop-dead-gorgeous hookers glimmering like sensuous pinatas while sharing a cigarette outside the clinic, and eventually, the filling of a PK prescription after finally locating the one 'farmacia' within 3 miles that had *any* Oxycontin in stock (span. 'Oxicontana', i think)... The prescription itself was for thirty 20 mg. 12-hour time-release pills that ended up costing around $120 ($30/script, $90/meds)...And before someone tells me i'm full of shit or too-dumb-to-live or that i'm thicker than frozen molasses, save it. You're wrong, and any forthcoming display of yer ignorance will only publicly solidify yer lack of firsthand knowledge, and goddamit, i was there, and quite sober, I might add (too sober...) and that's fucking good enough for me, who, coincidentally, is the only person I pay any attention to... (and btw, the meds 'work'...quite well, in fact... according to at least one pillow-hugging mattress urchin currently chasing Jungian sugarplums in the Sonoran desert...) and the irony? it was me, who was sitting at the doctor's desk along side my friend-in-pain, insisting "this can't be right...he's trying to sell you shit...or something misrepresented...or some mutant pseudo-drug with a name like D-Toxicontin...C'mon, let's get a drink...don't waste yer fucking money...trust me..." And our escort for the afternoon, an amiable capitalist del sur wearing a Guatemalan cowboy hat, sensed my cynicism regarding the entire transaction, and assured me, in between spaghetti-western puffs off his Havana cigar, that i'd be scratching my head with a golly-gee gringo-face smile as soon as we got to the pharmacy (at which, i should mention, the resident pill-counter called the MD to verify the script was kosher, which i'd never seen any pharm-worker do before in all of the dozens of med-purchases i've made in that city...) THE BIG QUESTION BY YERS TRULY: "Are you sure this is OK to bring across the border?" "Si, yes...stop worrying...ahhahhaaa..." "The laughing ain't helping, ese..." "Ahhahahahaaa..." which brings me to the crux of the entire WHAT DRUGS CAN I GET IN MEXICO discussion-orgy that's drifted in and out of a.d.h. like a prodigal phantasm in recent years...or in other words, the much debated UFO sighting some of us are convinced is an innocuous weather balloon shaped like an Ultram tablet...while others vehemently insist it's a modified space-coupe that's simply being re-fueled on earth before being driven back to its suburban townhouse garage in an exclusive neighborhood on Mars... ...anyway, the crux... THOSE THAT WRITE PRESCRIPTIONS IN MEXICO DO SO ARBITRARILY...AND SUBSEQUENTLY, THE PHARMACIES AND THOSE THAT WORK IN THEM FILL PRESCRIPTIONS ARBITRARILY (note: after filling the Oxycontin and a 'Pam Diez' script for my companion, the pharmacist refused to fill my own pathetic script for some 'Pam Diez' as well as some Ativans, which could be likened to Corona signs and pre-adolescent gum-peddlers as far as prevalence goes in the bordertown... "Why won't he fill mine?" I asked our homegrown escort as we were walking to another pharmacy, 20 feet away. "Why? He's got an attitude, that's why...Wait til I see him walking home tonight...I'll make sure my police friends are around," he grinned. (Insert yer own explanation of why he wanted cops around when he confronted the troublesome pill-peddler...) what else? the timing, meaning the day-of-the-week is crucial as far as simply locating oxycontin in the pharmacies...on a certain day, they all arrive, and the black-marketeers pretty much empty the shelves (selling single 20mg tabs on the streets for $12, with many-a-pillmonkey happily paying the going rate...) ...and for those with a vested interest in learning this distribution schedule? find out yerself. i did. and i don't even take the goddamn things. and they were by far the most expensive meds i've seen down there... (and if i had a scanner hooked up to this PC, i'd post the receipt w/ OXYCONTIN printed on it for yer perusal...) and oh, yea...the moon is going to make me rich...porque es mi luna y mis suenos de SUPERLOTTO JACKPOTS esta la verdad...y blah... and is it me, or was anyone else reminded of Bela Lugosi meeting his maker soon after kicking morphine when Charles Schulz keeled over the day after Charlie Brown bellowed his last curse toward Willie McCovey, while landing on his spherical head, seeing stars and Peppermint Patty with the football still in her hands and the girl with the curly hair in the distance who never sent 'Chuck' a valentine? capt. 5-cents for psychological advice and yes i'm going to sleep, inc. PS: whether or not it's now the current 'law,' i was able to bring back 6 months worth of benzos as opposed to the 3-month-supply i've restricted myself to in the past...our cigar-smoking caballero friend informed me of this, though because i was waved through without a blink at the border, i have no idea if this is indeed the new maximum amount for prescriptions...or, if i inadvertently broke a federal law...whatever...y vayas con dios, los doperos...