This rather memorable little skit occurred at the 10th Anniversary Celebration of the House of the Argent Aspis... I'm very sorry I missed it.  Donated by Lord Gnurr Pink-Wrath.

[House Aspis, Trophy Room]
The rich, musky aroma of puma leather hangs heavily in the air.  There's a fireplace for warmth on chilly nights, and a well-stocked bar that lends warmth upon all occasions.  Many trophy heads line the dark maplewood walls, testament to the successful hunting efforts of Argent Aspis' fearless membership.  A swinging door on the room's north side leads to the kitchen.  Next to a wide bay window is a banner with a bronze plaque surmounting the case containing Aspis' charter.  You also see a savory herbed breadstick and the Gnurr disk.
Also in the room: Germinal, Tsarvena, Tellian who is seated, Lady Jeeta, Aurien who is seated, Lord Spaetzle, Lethender who is seated, Lady Kylieen who is seated, Eldreth who is seated, Naryia, Lord Fesig who is seated, Lady Xeldria, Lord Tierus who is seated, Lord Gowain who is seated, Puris who is seated, Thia  who is seated, Lady Heathyranne who is seated, Nofret who is seated, Kaldonis
Obvious exits: east.

Xeldria recites:

    "We have for you today,
     A wonderful little play.."

Xeldria recites:

    "I am Spech.  And this is my friend Frech."

Xeldria points at you.
You bow.

Xeldria recites:

    "Together, we are... the Mammoth Arachnids!"

Xeldria strikes a heroic pose.

You strike a heroic pose.

Xeldria clears her throat.
(Xeldria strolls along the stage, with Frech at her side.)

You survey the area.

Xeldria recites:

    "What a lovely morning to be alive!  The temple of Arachne looks more awe-inspiring than it did last night.  Speaking of which, I really do need to stretch out my eight legs from last night's festivities."

You recite:

    "Ahh, indeed Spech, let's go for a skitter around the temple, see how things are on this fine morn."

(Xeldria shakes out a leg and stretches to one side, then the other.)

(Gnurr twitches his mouth oddly.)

Xeldria recites:

    "That sounds like a wonderful idea Frech."

You stretch.

Xeldria nods.
Xeldria turns to face you.
Xeldria blinks at you.
(Xeldria holds back a look of horror.)

You grin.
You recite:

    "What is it, Spech?"

Xeldria recites:

    "Say Frech, my good arachnid, what is that furry thing hanging from your mandible?"

Xeldria clasps her hand over her mouth.
(Xeldria peers in for a closer look.)

You recite:

    "Oh, dear"

Xeldria squints at you.

(Gnurr picks slightly at his mouth.)

You recite:

    "It's this cursed furry halfling foot that I just can't get loose"

You recite:

    "The tough warrior skin is just the worst."

You recite:

    "I went out with my missus and our three-hundred-odd children for a feast last night in the town."

Xeldria recites:

    "And I thought I had a roudy evening."

(Xeldria chuckles to herself.)

You nod.

Xeldria recites:

    "So how are your kids?  I hear the missus is expecting another 100 by the end of the week."

Xeldria leans on you.

You recite:

    "They're fine"

You recite:

    "Those little miracles just keep on coming"

Xeldria recites:

    "Oh Frech, you sly spider, you."

You grin.
You wiggle your eyebrows.

Xeldria just nudged you.

You pace back and forth.
(Gnurr finally appears to dislodge something from his mouth, and smiles.)

(Xeldria continues to skitter and stroll around the stage with her companion Frech.)

(Xeldria stops suddenly.)

You blink.

Xeldria recites:

    "Look Frech, look over there.  It appears to be a hapless group of humanoids."

You squint.
(Xeldria points out into the audience.)

Gowain cowers.

You recite:

    "Indeed, they will make an excellent breakfast!"
 

Jeeta ducks her head.
Spaetzle removes a heavy wooden rolling pin from in his baker's satchel.
(Heathyranne pushes Germinal towards the spiders.)
You hear the voice of Spaetzle say, "here lil skpideys.."
Ahmeuseng shudders.

Xeldria recites:

    "Yes, let us see what we can cook up with them."

Heathyranne says, "Him first...nae me"
Heathyranne shudders.

You recite:

    "Argh, this elf hand is stuck in my spinneret!  You'll have to do the webbing!"

(Xeldria rubs her hands together in anticipation.)

You smack your lips.

Heathyranne laughs!

You drool.

Xeldria nods to you.

Germinal just nudged Heathyranne.

(Xeldria walks up to the audience and inspects them one by one.)

(Gnurr lunges into the audience!)

Gowain blinks.

Ahmeuseng blinks at Xeldria.

Gowain leans back.

Kylieen cowers.

Tellian wails!

You survey the area.

Spaetzle waves a heavy wooden rolling pin around.

Xeldria recites:

    "You take that short, hairy one.  I shall take the taller one with the bulging belly."

Spaetzle says, "doan touch me.."

You stare at Kaldonis.

You nod to Xeldria.

Tierus's jaw drops.

Xeldria points at Gowain.

Gowain says, "eeps"

(Gnurr advances on Kaldonis.)

Xeldria nods to you.

You bite Kaldonis!

Gowain ducks his head.

Tellian says, "my nightmare's always been Mammoth Arachnids"
Tellian cowers.

Xeldria recites:

    "Ah, they've spotted us!  We can't have them swinging those sharp pointed things at us now."

Xeldria cracks her knuckles!
Xeldria grins evilly.

Tellian snickers.

Xeldria gestures and utters a phrase of magic.

Xeldria gestures at Gowain.
Strands of webbing shoot forth towards Gowain.
  CS: +445 - TD: +195 + CvA: +2 + d100: +50 == +302
  Warding failed!
Gowain is firmly webbed in place.

You recite:

    "You'll have to spin them all up!"

Thia says, "Gah"

Xeldria gestures and utters a phrase of magic.
Xeldria gestures at Kaldonis.
Strands of webbing shoot forth towards Kaldonis.
  CS: +445 - TD: +7 + CvA: +20 + d100: +97 == +555
  Warding failed!
Kaldonis is firmly webbed in place.

Xeldria gestures and utters a phrase of magic.

Spaetzle glances at Gowain.

Xeldria gestures at Heathyranne.
Strands of webbing shoot forth towards Heathyranne.
  CS: +445 - TD: +176 + CvA: -8 + d100: +77 == +338
  Warding failed!
Heathyranne is firmly webbed in place.

Spaetzle chuckles.

You grin ear-to-ear.

You see Lady Heathyranne deChantal the Human.
She appears to be in her 80's, has shoulder length, curly black hair, violet eyes, and fair skin.
She has a golden phoenix rising from fiery crimson flames overlying a golden scroll inked with five conjoined circles tattoo on her ankle.
She is in good shape.
She is holding a cup of honeyed mint tea in her right hand.
She is wearing a golden phoenix pin, a thin cerulean bow, some deathstone earrings, a crystal amulet, a strand of black prayer beads, some soft black thrak hide gloves, an Argent Aspis pin, a wild black rose, a gleaming black onyx rose, an aquamarine glaes spider charm, a soft black linen cape lined with cerulean-blue spidersilk and clasped with a sapphire rose, some golvern-edged chainmail, a cerulean-blue spidersilk satchel strung with silken cords and clasped with a rose-shaped sapphire, a cerulean-blue silk music satchel, a cerulean blue kilted silk skirt, an anklet of tiny golden bells, and a pair of sparkling ruby slippers.

Tierus cowers.
Tierus gestures and utters a phrase of magic.
Tierus gestures.
Tierus suddenly disappears.

You recite:

    "I'll take the old human with the spidersilk bag, too... I think I
recognize that spidersilk!"

You stare at Heathyranne.

Xeldria turns to face Gowain.

You hear the voice of Tierus exclaim, "Eek!"

Germinal cocks his head at Heathyranne.

Xeldria nods to you.

You bite Heathyranne!

Kylieen shudders.

Xeldria turns to face Gowain.

You hear someone laugh.

Heathyranne exclaims, "eek!"

(Xeldria approaches Gowain menacingly.)

You recite:

    "And humans are good eating, too!"

Thia furrows her brow.

You notice Ahmeuseng slip out of hiding.

(Xeldria gnashes her teeth and begins frothing at the mouth.)
Heathyranne exclaims, "we're nae, we're nae!"

The webs dissolve from around Gowain.

You hurl yourself at Puris!

It's a bit trickier than it looked, your body goes wide and you land in a heap on the ground.
Roundtime: 8 sec.

You hiss.

Nofret says, "Trust me, we taste awful."

Puris glances at you.
Puris smirks.

You hear the voice of Tierus say, "Ah'll agree. Heathyranne's pro'lly all old an' tought."

The webs dissolve from around Heathyranne.

Xeldria says, "Stay put juicy morsel."

(Gnurr crouches up.)

Xeldria gestures and utters a phrase of magic.

Heathyranne exclaims, "I'm nae old!"

Xeldria gestures at Gowain.
Strands of webbing shoot forth towards Gowain.
  CS: +445 - TD: +195 + CvA: +2 + d100: +21 == +273
  Warding failed!
Gowain is firmly webbed in place.

You stand back up.

(Kylieen scoots behind Naryia, cautiously peeking over at the spiders with wide eyes.)

Xeldria pokes Gowain in the ribs.

Heathyranne smiles youthfully.

You hear the voice of Thia exclaim, "Run fer yer lives!"

Xeldria says, "So plump and tasty."
Xeldria drools.

Nofret cowers.
Tellian asks, "just wizened, Heathyr?"
Heathyranne says, "too young to eat...too scrawny too"
Germinal cowers away from Xeldria!
Heathyranne nods.

You exclaim, "That bracelet will make an excellent mandible-ring!"

You point at Nofret.

You see Nofret Hrist the Human Gleewoman.
She appears to be in her 40's, has long, braided red hair, grey eyes, and fair skin.
She has a crimson lute tattoo on her ankle.
She is in good shape.
She is wearing a diamond and silver necklace, a faceted ruby scarab pin, a sweeping grey velvet greatcloak, a pair of ivory satin slippers, a pair
of antique lace gloves, a carved fire opal ring, an exquisite blue sapphire bracelet, a sterling masque pin, a carved golden pine lysard case, a winter white panne velvet gown, and a mithril tiger head pendant.

The webs dissolve from around Kaldonis.

Kellorenah's jaw drops.

Nofret removes an exquisite blue sapphire bracelet from her wrist.

The webs dissolve from around Gowain.

(Gnurr advances on Nofret, drooling.)

Nofret offers you an exquisite blue sapphire bracelet.  Enter ACCEPT to accept the offer or DECLINE to decline it.  The offer will expire in 30 seconds.
Nofret says, "Here's your mandible ring."

Xeldria recites:

    "Oh blast, is that who I think it is coming around the corner?"

You turn around.

Xeldria recites:

    "Frech, Frech!  It's those snobby clergy again.  Damn priests ruin all our fun."

You feel the blood drain from your face.
You recite:

    "Those confounded folk!  Just when we have these fools harmless!"

You scowl.

Xeldria sighs.
Xeldria recites:

    "They always make us do their dirty work.  Snobbish clergy, too holy to lend a hand."

Xeldria mutters under her breath.
Xeldria turns around.

You recite:

    "Nothing for it, we'll just head into the city later tonight for an excellent feast"

You grin evilly.

Xeldria recites:

    "Look Frech, I think I spotted a halfling run that way!"

Xeldria points east.

You exclaim, "Ah ha!"

(Xeldria skitters away with Frech, after the fleeing halfling.)

You drool.